its officially less than a week before i go.
I went to disneyland tonight. hopefully not the last time before i leave, but if it is it will do justice. its weird walking through the park knowing that when i get back there is going to be so much new stuff. Usually its a process, and i see it all from start to finish, but now its going to be i get back and all the sudden its there.
I feel bad for whats going to happen in the next week. alot of people are getting mad at me because i cant/wont hang out. And its not that i dont want to, its just…that i dont want to. Its hard to explain how im feeling right now. Im excited for where im going, so excited its ridiculous, but im also a nervous wreck. To leave for 2 years? Almost no contact at all? Im going to miss basically everything for the next 2 years, and when i come back im pretty sure no one will be here. As much as people say that they will still be friends with me i find it hard to believe. You also said “we will be best friends for longer than forever. ill never leave you” and where are you now? exactly. And i know that ill move on with life too once i get back, its just alot to take in. I have a tendency to make things seem alot worse than they usually are, and im hoping that if it only happened one more time in my life it would be this time. I was watching the playoff video montage from last year, and i started crying because 1) i cry everytime i watch that video and 2) i wont be there for the playoffs for 2 freakin years. i love the playoffs. more than halloween. more than my birthday. not more than christmas, but more than new years. i just want everything to be alright, and it seems like thats the last thing on life’s list.
And then theres you. what do i do about you?
